Into the Unknown

Today I needed to get out of the house and touch some grass. I know, it's taboo for a computer science and math nerd like myself to go and touch some grass, but believe me when I say it's one of my favorite past time activities. I hit up one of my friends to go on a short hike today, and we embark on our journey.

We start at the trailhead around 8:30 am and start trotting along. The brisk morning air caresses my face, and the gentle morning light hits my face. The morning is chilly, the mud is frozen and there is still snow on the trail, but my friend and I don't mind: we missed being in nature and in each other's company.

Now, my friend has this amazing quality of asking what I like to call "Real Questions," you know the ones that are like "What would you do if you had 24 hours left to live?" or "What would you say to your younger self if you could send them a message?" They are nothing crazy, but he is never afraid to ask these questions with strangers upon first meeting them.

Anyway, this is not about an interesting encounter with a stranger, this is about a serious conversation we had, just two 22-year olds giving each other advice about one of life's questions: Will we ever have it figured out?

Beware the Unknown

I feel like I am at a point in which everything is changing: I have an amazing new relationship, I am about to graduate, I just came back from studying abroad, the Lenten season has just started, I am going to start a new job, and more. I am sure many of us probably feel like this to an extent (new house, new job, new location, new something - I don't know), and sometimes it can feel overwhelming to have to deal with the fact that we don't know what we will deal with. In other words, we are overwhelmed by the unknown. Crazy concept, right?

But it's strange to have such a strong and averse reaction to something that hasn't even happened yet. Sure, we can have mechanisms for anxiety to survive in the wild, and mechanisms of our gut feeling so that our subconscious mind can make connections that our conscious mind might not be able to in time, but something about fearing the unknown in our future seems different and almost like a sickness.

I can't recall a time in which I was worried about a future event, and then when the event occurred, I said "Oh thanks be to God that I spent that much time worrying about this event." If anything, we are generally (and again, these are assumptions based on MY experience) relieved that we don't have to worry about the potential events ever again. Is that making sense? The worry and anxiety of the unknown pays little to no benefit to the outcome of the whatever we don't know will happen.

Sure, things such as exams, interviews, and promotions bring some sort of level of uncertainty and anxiety to our lives, but in worrying about these, we are moved to be productive and proactive to actually change the outcome. But what about those situations in which we have no control over? For me, here are such questions: Where do I want to live? How long will I stay at my current job? When should I start preparing to marry?

I feel like I have this pressure to have it all figured out right now, even though I am told over and over and over again that no one ever has it figured out. So why then do I bother so much with this?

Knowing the Unknown

There's a lot I don't know. There's a lot you don't know. And unfortunately, there is a lot that we will never know. Things like, trying to predict what will happen in the future, the winning lottery numbers (unless you are very lucky), or determining if water is wet, the unknown will always exist, so how should we define our relationship with the unknown?

I think for starters, we have to understand where the unknown lives. The unknown only lives in the future and the past. The unknown from the future focuses on all of the possible outcomes of our actions and decisions today. The unknown from the past, focuses on how our current situation could have changed if our course of actions were different. In reality, we can see that the fear of the unknown stems from some sort of chain reaction of events, whether we start from the past and end in the present moment (unknown of the past) or we start from the present moment and end in the future (unknown of the future).

By understanding that the unknown lives in the past and future, and is a chain reaction phenomenon, we can slowly start to realize that the only place in which the unknown does not exist is the present moment. The unknown of the past keeps us in regret and depression, and the unknown of the future keeps us in paralysis and anxiety. In both situations, we are far from the present moment.

Solving the Unknown

That's it! Stay in the present moment and make the most of it! We solved the issue with the unknown, we can all go home now and never have to deal with the unknown!

I WISH.

There are two issues:

1. Staying in the present moment is super difficult. I mean, there's a reason that monks who dedicate their lives to meditation and mindfulness can achieve being present and talk about it so easily: it takes so much time and dedication to be able to do so consistently and not be pulled away by an unknown at any point!
2. What do we mean by making the most of "it"? What is "it"? If it's life, how does one make the most of life? Is it carpe diem, seizing life by the day? Is it exercising all freedom recklessly? Courageously? Everyone has their own priority in life and their own life lessons, so it's not exactly easy to determine how to achieve this, and let alone, it's difficult to determine if any one answer is correct.

This is where I use my 22-year old knowledge and experience and tell you step-by-step how to solve these issues... except I am only 22 and don't know much about this issue (there I go again with another unknown, smh). But in all seriousness, there are hundreds if not thousands of resources out there that can help with mindfulness and being present. And for answering the second question? I'd recommend talking with those who have more life experience than you.

My Final Words

If you REALLY want my opinion, I'd say being present occurs when you learn to be who you were created to be. Yes, I am religious, but you could extend that to being your true nature. How do we make the most of it and what is it? It is experiences, and to make the most of it, step out of your comfort zone, but also take care of yourself.

To conclude, here is a short poem of what I think of it all.

Into the Unknown — a poem written by Hector Armando Rodriguez

Birds, Trees, and Snow
We march up real slow
And though we want to know,
We don't know where we'll go.

How can we show, all that we've grown?
Our end we won't know but our life is here though

The water goes with the flow,
The bird caws its crow.
The wind starts to blow,
And the grass feeds some doe.